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The shortest straw has finally been pulled for me. - Freedom is often taken for granted. [Northern Colorado Militia] [Boy Scouts In Cortland]
July 24th, 2004
08:18 pm


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The shortest straw has finally been pulled for me.
I have had it. I really have. You all win, I have snapped, I am done. I admit it. I can take it no more, so laugh it up. I learned my lesson. Yet another hard lesson learned, which didn't need to be had I listened to myself as usual. For the past 3 days, every plan I made has become obselete to everyone else. No matter what it is it's not me. I have had it with all this and I am done, through and through. No one knows what I am talking about but that is ok, because I am going to a better place. My room. With My books. And My music. What am I free from? I am free from the constant reminder of how many two-faced people their are. Free from stress. Free from disappointments from plans. Free from spending money I don't have. Free from wasted time. Free from everything! And being free from everything is freedom. And I like freedom. So I am out. No more.

I'll leave you with my final thoughts in song form:

I can't remember anything
Can't tell if this is true or dream
Deep down inside i feel to scream
This terrible silence stops me

Now that the war is through with me
I'm waking up i can not see
That there is not much left of me
Nothing is real but pain now

Hold my breath as i wish for death
Oh please god,wake me

Back in the womb its much too real
In pumps life that i must feel
But can't look forward to reveal
Look to the time when i'll live

Fed through the tube that sticks in me
Just like a wartime novelty
Tied to machines that make me be
Cut this life off from me

Hold my breath as i wish for death
Oh please god,wake me
Now the world is gone i'm just one
Oh god,help me hold my breath as i wish for death
Oh please god help me

Darkness imprisoning me
All that i see
Absolute horror
I cannot live
I cannot die
Trapped in myself
Body my holding cell

Landmine has taken my sight
Taken my speech
Taken my hearing
Taken my arms
Taken my legs
Taken my soul
Left me with life in hell

Current Mood: stressedstressed
Current Music: "One" by Metallica

(5 comments | Leave a comment)

Date:July 25th, 2004 12:56 am (UTC)
I'm out too bro.
[User Picture]
Date:July 28th, 2004 10:31 pm (UTC)
well mike when we go play ultimate frizbee...it'll brighten up ur day :)
[User Picture]
Date:July 29th, 2004 04:18 pm (UTC)
And it's comments like that that make me come back for more.
[User Picture]
Date:July 29th, 2004 09:35 pm (UTC)
lol frizbee make ANYBODY smile...even if ur like me and arn't a pro like mike yet...haha
[User Picture]
Date:July 30th, 2004 04:11 pm (UTC)
lmao, I am hardly a pro. But I do pretend sometimes. its all cool.
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